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At this point, instead of trying to compare days to blog entries, I've decided to mark the date/time of when I actually write the blog update since my Internet connection has been imited....

27.9.2006 - 21:46


Well, *sigh* .. many changes are in place. I've rented an apartment in Old Town Bratislava for the remainder of my stay. My hopes were that since I'd be in Bratislava, I'd be easily able to connect up with the girls. Originally, the plan was to head to Trencin the weekend of October 7th to go to Maria's home where I'd meet up with her, Eva, and quite possibly Jana too. Unfortunately, I'm not too sure even this is going to happen, as Maria informed me today that the original plan may be tough since school started.........

The whole trip has gone completely warped. All my ideas and plans have been washed down the drain.. Eh, such a normal lifestyle for me at this point. I'm starting to get a nervous feeling of being all alone. The whole trip was planned, including the rental car and private cottage long before I met the girls. However, planning the trip with my mom, I knew I'd always have someone here to talk to. Now, knowing that I'll be alone and the girls are quite busy with school, I worry where I'll be mentally come my fly-home date of October 17th....

The plan was simple. Fly in. Spend a few days in Bratislava. Drive out to the cottage. Spend a few days exploring the town. Meet up with the realtor. Buy a house. Take random trips out to Milan, Italy .. Vienna, Austria .. maybe even Poland? .. .. .. Sadly, none of that is happening now. The new plan is a bit shameful, with a few perks...

The whole Bratislava trip was fantastic. I should be so grateful that these two Slovak girls have helped me out in every way. A year ago, I never would have expected to have so much fun with two people in a foriegn land. A connection has bonded between us, but I can only hope it stays maintained. So there's a completely positive side to this trip. After Bratislava, things started to slide down hill .. how exactly am I supposed to enjoy myself completely alone? .. I can't fall back on the girls, as they'll be so extremely busy with school (and the fact of the matter is, they've done so much for me, I feel a bit awkward asking much more of them). At least I'll be back in Bratislava.. An area I explored extensively.

I'll be heading back to Bratislava on Tuesday, October 3rd. The rented car will be turned back in (which is a waste for me in Old Town Bratislava anyways, as it's a pedestrian zone). From there? .. Who knows. I worry now if I'll even get another chance to hang out with either of the
girls. Regardless, I'll manage. I guess I'll find something to do around town. Maybe hop around a few bars. Or relax to the peaceful sound of the streets below.

Slovakia is something I've wanted so very badly. Why? .. I don't know .. Something has brought me here. I sit back an look at my life as a giant puzzle, and I recalculate the good and the bad things in my head. I see how this 'bad' thing equalled this 'good' thing. But, I'm not sure why I'm here now. I still feel strongly that the Lord brought me here for some purpose. I used to think I knew what that purpose was, but now? .. I'm so confused....... Why did everything so good have to end up being so bad? Why can't life ever go the right way for me once? .......

I still admit that I love it here. I love the style and culture here. I love everything about this place. I would love to call this place home..... but can I really do it all alone? I guess the next few weeks will answer my questions for me..... Will I manage? Your comments and ideas are very welcome (and highly requested). Drop me a line in the 'forum' or send me an e-mail directly. I could use the words of encouragement..................